It’s a Canadian Thing!

By Dr. Peter W. Kujtan, B.Sc., M.D., Ph.D.

There are things that some fellows have real trouble stomaching. Formal psychotherapy or counseling is one of those. Guys view counseling much like they do driving. They would sooner wander aimlessly for hours rather than admit to being lost and ask for directions. The admonition seems to provoke pain in the primordial “I’m always right” centre of the brain. Guys encounter a similar nausea when told that they MUST go see the doctor or therapist. Echoes of “ no one can tell me what to do” and “depart to a devilishly warm place doc!” abound at the mere mention of counseling. The trick lies in how you define the subject. The difference between mars and venus in approaching this delicacy is often merely superficial. Counseling is a journey into exploring your inner self, examining your own feelings and learning to communicate for the resolution of differences. A true therapist will never utter a judgmental comment. Rather, the experience is one of reflecting your own feelings and viewing them from other angles. This alone can enhance communication and understanding. But therapy comes in many shapes and sizes--especially for guys.

There are things that some fellows have real trouble stomaching. Formal psychotherapy or counseling is one of those. Guys view counseling much like they do driving. They would sooner wander aimlessly for hours rather than admit to being lost and ask for directions. The admonition seems to provoke pain in the primordial “I’m always right” centre of the brain. Guys encounter a similar nausea when told that they MUST go see the doctor or therapist. Echoes of “ no one can tell me what to do” and “depart to a devilishly warm place doc!” abound at the mere mention of counseling. The trick lies in how you define the subject. The difference between mars and venus in approaching this delicacy is often merely superficial. Counseling is a journey into exploring your inner self, examining your own feelings and learning to communicate for the resolution of differences. A true therapist will never utter a judgmental comment. Rather, the experience is one of reflecting your own feelings and viewing them from other angles. This alone can enhance communication and understanding. But therapy comes in many shapes and sizes--especially for guys.

Free-thought association begins from within the gathered group members. It is amazing what strangers come up with when sitting in their underwear. We share our inner most feelings and thoughts about the world, ourselves, our friends and even about the nature of relationships. We may not be able to solve all the problems in the world, but by gosh I think we came close on an occasion or two. Everyone is Free-thought association begins from within the gathered group members. It is amazing what strangers come up with when sitting in their underwear. We share our inner most feelings and thoughts about the world, ourselves, our friends and even about the nature of relationships. We may not be able to solve all the problems in the world, but by gosh I think we came close on an occasion or two. Everyone is encouraged to participate. It is understood that no information can leave the hallowed cavern. Somehow this experience lifts great burdens, eases guilt and can build self-esteem. But, it doesn’t end there. Once the great roar ceases, we adorn our ceremonial warrior suits and retreat to the great arena attached to the caverns. Here, mock battles are enacted with great speed using the hand carved staffs that we brought. It is simply a way of expending the enormous energy that was created in the therapy session. It all ends in a ritualized cleansing of the body with cold water. We then adjourn to share an elixir specially prepared for such events. The experience is invigorating for both the body and the soul. Best of all, it is relatively inexpensive and easily accessible. In one form or another, these types of men’s support groups have been around for millennia, and the participants would never even think of striking. I recommend it for any guy who thinks counseling is not for him. It may resemble a pagan rite of passage, but I call it Men’s Hockey!